I feel as if I am always waiting for something in life. You would think it would be by now, but patience is not one of my virtues. I am a very impatient person. I hate waiting for pretty much everything. I know it is one of my biggest flaws, and God is constantly using it as a way to teach me something. Because when I have to wait for something to happen in my life and can't change a thing about the time frame, I pretty much go nuts. So at that breaking point when I'm about to pull my hair out, scream my head off, or get angry about my life, is when God really gets my attention. It's where I make my choice of which way to handle near disaster. Give it to Him, or give into my pathetic self. I can tell him, "Lord, I've REALLY learned my lesson now, can you PLEASE make your move I'm sick of sitting here waiting!" But God obviously knows what I need. I try to remind myself of that daily. Minute-ly I should say.
My stubbornness is good for learning lots of lessons and constantly putting me in my place. I am not sure why God makes some people more impatient or stubborn then others, but I'm sure he gets a good laugh out of how hilarious my thinking I can decide how my life should go at times. ;) In the long run I think He is trying to teach me contentment and to be thankful for what he has given me. It's so easy to fall into a negative attitude after so long of being positive and things not going my way, but this is when a joyful and thankful spirit is put to the test and I find if those attitudes are for real or circumstance depending.
I have chosen to give my frustration and impatience to Him, so now I am trying to be thankful for so many things and remembering how much God has done for me. He really is amazing and has done so many wonderful things for me that I do not deserve!! I have a safe place to live, food to eat (even extras like ice-cream, coffee, and starbursts!! :D ) family, and last but not least, a husband who provides for me and loves me even when I am a cranky impatient person ;)
So many blessings in my life, I will count them while I wait.
"Those who wait for the LORD will gain new strength; They will mount up with wings like eagles, They will run and not get tired, They will walk and not become weary."