Thursday, October 25, 2012

Our Baby

I am going to share something that isn't really that easy.  But I have come to learn for me, it is better to talk about it then hold it in. To get it out and do my best to move on.

Last week I found out that I was pregnant. Exactly 2 years and 3 months since our wedding date. Something else I don't normally share, I have never taken any form of birth control or have never tried not to get pregnant. I have trusted God to give me a child when His time is best. I told my doctor a year ago I had gone over a year without conceiving. She said point blank I was infertile. A kick in the gut. I took many tests and everything came out fine. We were referred to infertility, but I guess the whole information packet asking several questions about how far we were willing to go to have a baby scared us off. So needless to say it has been a very long couple of years of thinking I was pregnant so many times, only for it to end in tears.

This time it was for real, a blood test confirmed. I am not sure I breathed for a while I was so excited. Hence the last minute trip to Maine to share our joy with his family.  The excitement, the plans, the emotions. . .

I started spotting on Tuesday. I prayed and prayed, pleaded and sobbed for God not to take away my baby. Tuesday night I had a miscarriage. I should have been better prepared but who can be I guess. It was a long night. Excruciating pain, physical and emotional.

We both took work off Wednesday. Kurt and I spent the day together. We went for a drive, we both held each other, we both cried, we thanked God for each other and prayed for another chance to have a baby.

My body is still processing this, but I hope it will be over soon. Nothing like a constant reminder. My hormones are all crazy of course, very high to very low over night. I have made it so far today without any tears, 3 hours left of work.

Although it was a very short time, I miss my baby.  But I trust God and hold onto His promises.

Coralie Rose

Monday, October 22, 2012

Fall Blessings

Kurt and I made a spur of the moment decision to go to Maine for the weekend.  It was nice to get away for a couple of days, and so relaxing! It was great to visit his family and spend some time together. We girls went shopping on Saturday and Kurt and his father went to shoot Kurt's gun. We spent the rest of the afternoon together and some friend stopped by in the evening to play games. Church together on Sunday, then out to lunch at the 99.

It's Monday again. Weekends seem to be flying by lately! But I am very much looking forward to Thanksgiving. Kurt and I both have a 4 day weekend, which is so exciting! He is trying to talk me into going out EARLY (I'm talking long before the rooster crows) in the morning to go shopping the day after Thanksgiving. (It's true) I don't think it is such a good idea? Anyone have a good or bad experience with that idea that wants to let me know if it is such a good idea?  ha ha

It is so beautiful outside. Every fallen leaf reminds me of eaching blessing God has sent down to me. I am so thankful for the lessons He has taught me over the past year, and am learning to be thankful for every trial and pain he has allowed to happen in my life. If I focus on His blessings, the hurt will never take over the joy of being His daughter.

But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, self-control; against such things there is no law.
                                                                                                 Galatians 5:22-23

Thursday, October 18, 2012

New job ! . . .again

You are all wondering when I am not going to be posting about some new event in my life : ) And wondering how LONG my resume is starting to look with all of these different jobs . . . haha

My nanny job was not going too great, so I ended up ending that one. I have a new job as of  last Monday, and this one I really like!  I am the new Administrative Assistant/Receptionist at Complete Staffing Solutions Inc. in Marlborough, MA. I am getting paid better then I ever have, am gaining new skills and really enjoying my days, and *drumroll* I have my own desk (lol), not to mention the whole front room to myself . It is just me at the front desk and I handle all of the Apps, Filing, Tax info (W4's, I-9's, etc.), and anything else that needs to be done.

We are still looking to move out. . . only a couple of weeks left!

Enjoying the beautiful Fall scenery on my drives every day!